HEALING BROKEN HEARTS AND WOUNDED SOULS

Archive for the ‘depression’ Category

Moving on or moving away?

forgive

Sometimes, we have to move away physically for our hearts to heal.

At other times, we just stay on but let our hearts move on in forgiveness.

Sometimes the pain goes away.

At other times we learn to live victoriously in spite of the pain.

We can’t run away from every monster in life. Sometimes you have to kill that monster and take back your treasure.

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Lord, if it be your will take this away…

brokenness

 

If you’ve never been there, then you’re never going to really understand what is at stake in their life; so why not just pray for them and leave it at that?

Why not just hold back that comment and observe instead?

They may not be as complacent as you think.

They may be spending sleepless nights over it.

They may be in the middle of a fast because of it.

They might have begged God a hundred times to take that thing away.

Perhaps they’ve got their lessons to learn;

Perhaps it’s a thorn in their flesh they have to live with;

Perhaps their faith is being tried;

Perhaps….God alone knows why.

Do not put that label on them;

Do not make that conclusion you are about to make;

Do not judge, categorize and condemn.

Rather, ask from God the wisdom and discernment to see beyond the physical,

Then you may begin to understand what they are having to endure.

 

 

No matter what happens…

Admire people who have been through a lot and still keep their head up. Head Up! Even though you are going through a tough time. This is a must attitude during healing journey. Image credit : Pixabay – PublicDomainPictures

via Quote of the day # 17 : Head Up — Rebellious Scapegoat

Image

Moving on…not easy but very necessary

wrong people

What good can possibly come out of this hell hole?

my pictures (3)

Have you ever had to ask yourself this question? Especially when the hell you’re going through doesn’t look like anything positive can possibly come out of there?

Before I met my narcissist partner I was all insecurity, low self-esteem, low self-confidence….and all the lows you can imagine.

In fact I really felt so bad about myself; when he came love-bombing me I thought I’ve got the lever out of hell. He made me feel like a queen. But then, the bomb fell. He showed his hidden colors.

It was like I’d been taken up Mount Everest and then let down to crash into the rocks down the valley. I was in a worse state than he met me. Then I thought “If I do what he wants, he’ll stay and be the man he used to be”. All my efforts where but in vain.

Then the therapy started. I started searching for help; what kind of man can possible do this to a woman. Then I discovered narcissism. I studied it; I dissected it and labeled its parts. And then I knew the disease I’ve been suffering from.

When the diagnosis is correct, there is hope yet for the victim.

I’ve been on the healing journey and I just want to let the world know this;

  • I’ve been healed of more than just the narcissistic abuse. Learning to get over it has helped me to build my self-confidence, self-worth and a sense of purpose and direction in life.
  • I know what I want and I’m ready to go for it. I won’t settle for less.
  • I’ve learned to take care of myself: feeding, dressing, relationships, relaxation…I really feel stronger and more confident than ever before.

He took me up Mount Everest and let me come crashing down. Once I had my back on the ground, I had no other option but to start a slow but steady climb to victory. I love the new me; I just love it here where I am.

Thank you Mr. narcissist. What you meant for evil, God has turned it for my good.

I choose to walk away

evidence building 3

I choose to walk away

Away from the past, its hurts, pains and shame

I choose to walk away from the choices I made in the past

Choices that seemed so logical and beneficial

I opt for change, the willingness to embrace the future I do not yet see

I choose to part with my own understanding, the one that let me into that mess

I will depart from myself, the self that I trusted but got disappointed.

I’ve discovered a new me, a me that so pleases me

And I won’t let anything take that away from me.

 

 

The year of the Narc.

Yes, I’ll call it the year of the Narc because he had his year in my life.

He came in, got what he wanted and walked away leaving me in utter shreds. He knew how to go about his business with tact and expertise. He bombed into my life like a meteor, showed me paradise and then took it away before I had the time to take a second bite. I was the queen of the season, the most sought after, the one and only desirable…then  I began to dream big dreams and to see a great future, but like the mirage he’s always been, he vanished into the distance, leaving me in a state of despair to figure out for myself what the hell was going on in my world.

Then one day I stumbled on a blog that had everything to say about narcissists. I began to understand why I’ve always felt so lonely, not good enough; why I compromised so much and got so little; why  I was called names, mocked and despised no matter how much effort I put in. I understood why he will choose to stay away for months when we had a hard talk; why he will continue to stay away even when I cried, begged, repented and promised to change just for him. (I stopped worshiping God and worshiped him instead)

But all this while he knew what he was up to. While I was perplexed and bewildered, he was playing his game and having fun. While I spent sleepless nights he was out there probably with “new supply”. Yes, Kim Saeed, your blog saved my life.

I went for “no contact”; failed once, twice and then thrice…because I kept thinking of the golden days and the possibility of having them back.

But one day I decided I’d had enough of tears for breakfast, lunch and supper. I took the great leap for good. That’s why I can now tell the story. That’s why I now help other women to see the light and leave the dark.

It was the year of the Narc. But God kept me through it so I can tell this story today. Narcissism is a terrible thing to endure. It hurts to the deepest parts of your being. Run for your life and let God help them if He would.

This is my experience during twelve months of hell on earth. I hope you never have to live there too.

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