HEALING BROKEN HEARTS AND WOUNDED SOULS

Archive for the ‘inspirational’ Category

Image

HAPPY NEW YEAR

Thank you for making me a blogger

I look back and I see a mountain of love, a room full of care

I’m speechless…you’ve been so wonderful all year round

You may not know it, but because of you I’m called a blogger

I’m a writer because you are the reader

You amazed me with you faithfulness

Your support kept me going

I always found the strength to come back

Because I knew you were waiting

Expecting yet another post

So I found the courage to come back

Even when I had to crawl on my belly

A big thank you to all my followers, readers, friends…

You made my year and I just want to say THANK YOU..DANKE…MERCI…

As a man thinks in his heart, so is he…

Have you ever heard yourself asking that kind of question? It happens at times that we get embarrassed by our own words and actions. Perhaps you meant well, but before you knew it you blew it and shamed yourself. Then you gave yourself a tag and started behaving like the label you gave yourself.

What motivates your choices in life? That could hold a clue to the reason why you keep acting the way you do.
The way you see yourself is very instrumental in determining the kind of decisions you make in life. If you see yourself as good, talented, cute and useful it will be reflected in your dress code, speech, the neighborhood you prefer and the kind of company you keep.

A person who thinks they are silly, dumb and good at nothing will act exactly that way. It will be reflected in the way they walk, talk and carry themselves. The kind of stuff you buy for yourself, the man you date, your dressing and eating habits all point to the way you see yourself.

It all begins in the mind. When you change your mind you will change your actions and you will change your life.
If you find yourself always going in for the cheap and ugly stuff, even when you could afford something better, it may be a sign that you have a bad self-image. You think that is all you deserve. You think the good things in life are meant for everyone else except you.

Take care of yourself. You have just one life to live. Like the desiderata says, “you are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars, you have a right to be here…”

HARD TO PLEASE? DEAL WITH IT NOW.

When I look back on my life I discover that the time I was the hardest to please coincides with the time I hated myself the most. What is the relationship between these two realities?

If you do not like yourself, nobody else will be able to make you do it and you will be rather hard to please. Why do people hate themselves so?

  1. Long exposure to negative feedback. When people keep hitting it home that you are no good, you could end up accepting it and that will define the way you see yourself.
  2. Lack of positive feedback and appreciation for efforts you invest. When no one ever tells you it was well done you could start thinking you never do anything worth encouraging.
  3. Your best efforts always seem to produce the most mediocre results. You must find out what you are good at and excel therein. You can’t get your best grades in an area you are not gifted in.
  4. The kind of things that happened to you in the past. You might have messed up much too often. But remember, we all do mess up sometimes.
  5. Disabilities that make you look and feel different. This could be very tough, but not impossible to overcome. You need God’s grace for this one. God can enable you to love yourself in spite of any disability you carry.

                                                                                                                                                          

When faced with self-hatred, we must not blame anyone for our condition. This will only lead to bitterness and that is not good either, for our emotional stability.

It will be an error to try to use our relationships as a means of finding happiness. Strive to get happy as an individual. If you want to get it out of others you might become too demanding and more difficult to please.

Don’t use other people’s successes and achievements as a means to your own happiness. They might no longer be there tomorrow and you will find yourself sinking even lower.

From my own experience I can tell you that getting a lot of stuff around you doesn’t help. A new house, a new car etc. will help you but only for a season.

Ask yourself if you can really be happy if all the stuff were taken away from you. If the answer is yes, then you are happy indeed, or let me say you are experiencing joy.

What do I do then?

  • Ask God to show you your intrinsic value. There is something about you that when you discover you will begin to sing, and then you will never stop singing ever.
  • Develop your potentials and become a blessing to others. There is great joy in giving. When you live your life helping others you will hardly get depressed.
  • Find out your weaknesses and accept them. Stop trying to wipe away your weaknesses by your efforts. If you fail you could become more depressed. Acknowledge them, bring them to God and leave them there.
  • Read the kind of books that will build up your self-image. Avoid going to places and being with people that speak negativity, that always try to bring you down.

Be happy apart from them, then you will be happy with them.

When you get into a relationship it should be to share what you have, not to get what you want.

TOO EMOTIONALLY CONNECTED? IT’S TIME TO GET GOING.

Life is made up of times and seasons. We are called upon to move on from one place, situation and level to another. This will happen to each one of us from time to time. There are moments of transition and there are new challenges and targets to handle all the times.

We can’t grow, make progress or even succeed in life if we get stuck in one position.
The problem with people like me is that we often get too emotionally attached to some situations that are meant to be only temporary; a job, a mentor, a habitation etc. It becomes difficult to let go and keep going when it’s time to break camp and advance.

In my own experience, God has dealt with this issue in my life in a number of ways:
A. He sometimes provokes a conflict that will then end up kicking me out of my comfort zone.
B. He sometimes incites people to reject and hate me outright. This is usually when I insist on holding unto a dead end- a relationship that has come to its natural end.
c. I have had situations where I was moved to hate an environment; this as preparation for me to move to a new location. Isn’t it amazing that the things that you loved and cherished yesterday have become simply unbearable to you today? Perhaps it’s time to move on.

 Now, let’s be very careful here. There are things you are not permitted to move on from. You can’t just move on from your marriage, spouse and kids because you no longer feel like staying on. You will be hurting a whole lot of people and bringing more disorder and pain in society. You can’t move on from your assignment because things have become too tough. God calls us for life, not for ‘as long as it feels good’.

 Sometimes the movement is not necessarily physical. It might be emotional or psychological; you may have to stop engaging in a certain activity, dressing in a particular style or treating someone in a particular manner. For instance, when your children become adolescents you move on from the way to used to talk to them when they were just little kids.

 Remember, there is no promotion without movement (physical or mental). If you resist moving on when it is the time to do so you could miss out on what God wants to do in your life for that season. You could then be stuck on one spot all your life.
On your marks, get set, move…

“Yes, you can”: “No, you can’t”…Strike a balance

Yes, you can.

  • Just believe in yourself and you’ll get there.
  • There’s nothing in the world that can stop you from getting there.
  • Dream big and you’ll achieve big.

No, you can’t.

  • You’re not the right color.
  • You’re too short.
  • It’s too costly for you.

Strike a balance.

  • It’s possible, but you have to get so talented no one will notice your color but only your talent.
  • You can do it, but be ready to jump higher than the tallest fellow on the pitch.
  • You can afford it, but be ready to cut down on your expenditure and forgo a lot of stuff you would normally want to buy.

Yes, you can; but be ready to roll your sleeves and get to work, whatever work entails for you (studying, connecting, investing, praying, fasting, sowing etc).

Asking for and receiving help: How good are you at it?

Do you feel comfortable asking for help? Do you with ease receive and appreciate help from others?

Let’s share our experiences in this area.

If your answer to the above questions is no, then read on as we examine some of the reasons why people feel uncomfortable with this.

  • You’ve always done it your way. You don’t want another person’s way out.
  • You’re used to doing it alone. You prefer the solo route.
  • You once asked for it and were rejected; you’re scared of rejection.
  • You’re too proud to admit you need help.
  • You think asking for help is a sign of weakness and insufficiency.
  • You have a false sense of responsibility; you don’t want to inconvenience anyone.
  • You don’t want to have to pay for it one day; you don’t like helping others yourself.
  • You just don’t know how to ask for help. You walk down to the fellow and then you walk pass them tongue-tight.
  • You don’t know how to receive and appreciate help; you’re afraid to mess up.

Whatever your own reason may be it is important to get to the root of it and get over it.

It feels very miserable to be in need of something someone wants to offer, yet be held back from asking for any reason whatsoever.

The world is full of people who want to help you. Do not shut them out of your life. Give them the opportunity to experience the joy of giving.

Your choices count

Featured image

Go for the roses. God will take care of the thorns.

What are you thinking about, now?

Featured imageThe kind of life you live could be a result of the quality of your thoughts..

Lay your Isaac on the altar and leave him there

Featured image

We all want God to do great things in our lives. We want Him to use us mightily.

We want to be carriers and transmitters of the presence, power and glory of God.

But there is one great condition that must be fulfilled. We must lay down our all.

We must let Him empty us of all, strip us of us, then He can trust us enough to put AK47s in our hands.

Have you put Isaac on the altar? Have you left him there or you are about to take him back home because you do not trust your God enough to entrust your life into His hands?

Grace: Have you ever experienced it?

Featured image

Only those who have received of the grace of God are able to show grace and mercy to others. You can’t give what you don’t have.

If you have never known and experienced God’s grace, you could be unnecessarily hard on others because you do not know just how merciful God is.

When you open your heart to His grace he will pour out so much of it into your heart that when you open your mouth to speak, it is grace that will flow.

Grace is so deep, so unique that we tend to misunderstand it.

Sometimes we fight against grace (God) because we can’t handle the kind of blessing grace has bestowed on us.

Those of us who have always got it by hook, crook and work find it hard to just settle down to the fact that this time we got it all for free, by His grace.

Those of us who have messed up so badly in the past and have paid dearly for it find it hard to understand why God will just forgive us without us paying the price. (Jesus paid that price on the cross).

If you fail to understand grace you could spend your entire life fighting against God’s will for your life.

Knowledge of the grace of God will free you from a lot of headaches and heartaches in this life.

There is always a Jethro in your wilderness

The night is too dark; the sun is extremely hot; the pain is excruciating; the loneliness is unbearable. Lord, where are you? Didn’t you tell me You love me and that You will supply all of my needs according to Your riches in glory? What is happening to me now? What will I tell my girlfriend Monday morning? That my God, for some reason has dumped me?

Ever been there? Yes. I bet you have. We have all gone through situations which made us to begin to doubt God and jabber. We begin to wonder whether we had done well to trust Him.

I can tell you that many a times I have had to repent of my jabbering when I finally realize how stupid it was for me to doubt God. Our God will turn nasty things into creative miracles. Over and over He has given me fresh water in the wilderness at a time I thought “It’s over. I’m undone.” Then I have had to look back and say, “O Lord, how could I have ever doubted you?”

The encounter between Moses and the priest of Midian is recorded in Exodus chapter 2. Moses had taken on himself to save the Jews at a time when God had not yet prepared or anointed him for that task. He ended up killing an Egyptian and then fled to the wilderness to hide from Pharaoh’s wrath. There he met Jethro who lodged him, fed him and employed him. Moses later married his daughter. That was great comfort wasn’t it?

This story came back to me powerfully the other day because of something that happened to me. I was completely broke, but I was expecting some money from someone who owed me a fair sum. In fact my situation was so stark that I had to trek for about three kilometers just to collect the said money. It was very sunny and hot; it was uncomfortable to say the least.

But then, God showed up. He did not send someone to pick me up in his car. He did not provide me the money for transportation. He decided to give me a good chunk of inspiration as I walked the streets. I just kept getting powerful thought that required me writing them on pieces of paper. Good enough I always move around with writing material because I usually receive inspiration sometimes in the most unlikely places.
On this journey, I kept stopping at people’s verandas, doorsteps and car boots to write down inspired thoughts that came to my mind. Before I knew it I wasn’t feeling the heat any longer. I was keener on getting the next revelation and inspiration. The proof of it is this article you are reading now.
At the end of the journey I found myself thanking God for inspiration rather than complaining about poverty or the extreme heat.
I don’t know what kind of heat you are dealing with now. Is it poverty, loneliness, divorce, disease, persecution…? I can assure you that if you will just take time off to search in that wilderness you will discover some gold hidden in the mud.

Allow your loneliness to draw you closer to God.

If someone divorced you, remind yourself that you were surviving on your own before they came along any way.

Let that disease cause you to get a revelation of God as the great healer.

When you are persecuted for your faith or for defending the truth, comfort yourself with these thoughts, “God Himself was, and is still being persecuted on a daily basis.”

I have learned to always expect something good in the worst of situations. Put God to the test and He will confirm His covenant with you. “For He has said, I will never leave you, nor forsake you” (Hebrews 13:5b).
Whenever I find myself in a challenging situation, my first reaction is to ask God to show me what He is doing in my life. When He chooses to be silent, it could be an indication that He wants me to get closer to Him and just sit there and savor His presence.

I know I am a child of God, His Majesty’s darling daughter. He will never allow me go through pain for no good reason. That is why I’m not ashamed to ask Him to help me see the rose that is hidden behind the thorns. My God is not like Shakespeare’s gods. “As flies to wanton boys are we to the gods; they kill us for their sport” (King Lear).

YOUR SILENCE

Your silence is perpetuating that evil and lengthening the list of victims. You are a mouthpiece for some who are suffering in silence. Speak out!
Julius Caesar’s wounds are but dumb mouths
They cannot speak
Be his Anthony and let it be known.

The Gentleman who didn’t care about make up

A gentleman so fair and fun
Asked me out for a date and more
Just the kind of man I’ve longed for
Praying and hoping and wishing he came.

But then I began to think and consider
What will he say about this scar?
What about the bruises I still carry?
I look really awful and out of shape.

I searched around for some to help
Shopped and hoped he liked my look
I made-up, I cut down and wore some masked too
I entered his presence thinking ‘I did my best.’

My Lover looked at me in the face
Not with admiration but full compassion
Then He shed a tear that took me aback
He saw my confusion and then spoke out.

“My sweet, sweet little girl,
I know just what you’ve been up against
You need not hide the scars or bruises
They cannot destroy that beauty I put in you
I love you just as you are.
Never try to earn my love another day
I love you, I love you, I love you
My sweet, sweet little girl.

An excerpt from one of my yet to be published books.

 care 2No matter how many people hate you, there is always someone who cares about you. His name is Jesus.

The area of town where you live can determine your outlook to that town. Your station in life can easily influence the way you see life itself. It ought not to be so. Life is bigger than your individual position and the town is bigger than the street in which you live. If you walk down the street and turn left, you are likely to discover the other face of your town. Life has many faces and the one you live in should never be the only contributing factor in building your opinion about life.

There are many nice people in that quarrelsome family next door;there is a sweet, quiet and well-behaved girl in that prostitute infested street; there is a nice lady behind that heartless harlot who just killed her own child; there is a gentleman in that drug addict who raped your daughter. The question is will you look deeper? Will you see the beauty behind the apparent ugliness? Is there a savior in Rahab? Will you help Rahab bring out the best that is hidden behind the ugly?

This book is intended to create awareness, a consciousness in men and women of our day about the importance of taking a second Look before giving the label. How many people have we labeled “hopeless” just to find out later that they carried a treasure within them? We are supposed to have the heart of our Lord Jesus Christ who sat at a well in a hostile territory waiting to have a closer look at a woman the Samaritan community has branded “hopeless.” Only then can we bring out the evangelist that is hidden behind the emotionally unstable woman; the one who has been jumping in and out of every bed in town. My prayer is that this book would create a paradigm shift in us as concerns branding and labeling individuals in our communities. It is my humble desire to see people throw off the veil that has labeled them, in order to enjoy the life Christ died for them to have.

Tag Cloud

%d bloggers like this: