HEALING BROKEN HEARTS AND WOUNDED SOULS

Archive for the ‘JESUS’ Category

My Easter fever

It’s a season for me to reflect,

To look back and reflect on the distance we have covered together,

Since that day You took me by the hand

And showed me there is more to life than pain and shame.

Gentle Lord and Savior,

I’m so blessed to be yours, and for ever,

I pledge my eternal allegiance and loyalty,

My love and submission to your will.

But there will be days when it seems hard to take the narrow road,

Yet you have promised never to leave me nor forsake me,

With this promise I look to future with hope,

For faithful are You to bring me home save to you.

 

From the storm came a great peace

 

Something wonderful happened to me this week.

The Lord told me to forgive some people who’ve hurt me so badly

and to go meet them and pray for them.

You could think it’s that easy, but I spent a sleepless night just imagining

how I will have to go down to those people who owe me

apologies, tell them I forgive them, then pray for them.

But I finally swallowed my pride and timidity and did just that.

When I began to pray with one of them, she just broke down to tears…especially when I

mentioned that I’m releasing her from the prison of my heart so that she can get blessed.

I just realized how much hurt I had been causing by keeping them in the prison of my heart.

At the end of it all, I felt so good, free and joyous. They too.

I challenge you to do same. Do not hold that person in the prison cell of your heart any longer. Do not even wait for God to say so.

Release them, pray for them and you will get blessed yourself.

It’s good to know God is not keeping someone in bondage because I, His servant have refused to forgive them.

Remember Jesus said, whom we forgive He will forgive too.

“Because of my son”

They’ve been times I almost gave up.

There are times I feel like throwing in the towel.

Very often I’ve wanted to do something really stupid…

But then I thought of how it will affect my son,

How he will live to suffer the effect…

Then I decided to choose the better option,

Even if it was the most difficult.

That is how God deals with us…

Because of His son He forgives you even when He shouldn’t,

He answers your prayers when you don’t deserve it,

He forgives you when you mess up,

He promises great things for you that you can not pay for

BECAUSE OF HIS SON.

What will you give to God this season BECAUSE OF HIS SON?

Give Him your whole heart, your worship and trust.

That’s the least you can do BECAUSE OF HIS SON.

Why I got out of bed this morning

Some years back I was hopeless, lost and suicidal.

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Then I asked God why He ever suffered me to live on the earth.

He showed me my purpose and His plan for my life.

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And then I began to live.

I live to give hope to the hopeless.

I live to heal broken hearts and wounded souls.

That is my purpose.

You are not single

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You are not single.

You are married to Jesus

One day He will lend you out for a season

To the man who dares present such a request

A faithful steward who will keep you in good shape

And present you to your husband when He comes to take you home

And if your Husband chooses to keep you jealously to Himself

Shout for joy for you are even dearer to His heart, most precious in His sight

And He knows you’ll never find a better husband than the one He is to you.

Thank you Lord

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Thank you Lord for always receiving us back with open arms

You never chase us away in anger when we come back to you

With bleeding wounds and festering ones

Even those wounds you did warn us about

Thank you Daddy, for your patience towards us.

The hardest part of Christianity: Living the crucified life

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If I’m sharing this, it’s not because I’ve crossed the finished line and can now turn around and mentor those who are still behind. I still have my own struggles in this area; but as I learn, I share to bless others.

What does it mean to live the crucified life?

  • Putting God first in everything I do. Not seeking my own pleasure first, but seeking to please Him first.
  • Always seeking to know what He desires and wants me to do in each situation.
  • Willingness to suffer rejection, humiliation, persecution and pain for His sake.
  • The willingness to accept His will even at my own inconvenience.
  • Acceptance that my own wishes, desires, will and pleasure are valid only if He validates them.
  • Refusal to take the glory for any victory won, but giving all the glory to Him.
  • The ability to say “Thy will be done”, from the very bottom of my heart.

Folks, this is the hardest part of Christianity and those who have attained to it receive of His spirit without measure.

May the Lord Himself help us to attain to such full stature so that we can indeed be His ambassadors on the earth.

Don’t ask me why

THE HEALING ARENA

Don’t ask me why I dance so strong
Ask me not why I shout ever so loud
Do you wonder why I sing so merry?
Even when the dark clouds seem ever to menace
And storms loom so high in the horizon?

Once upon a time I was lost and gone
Treading the treacherous road of life
Chasing a mirage that seemed ever so far
Weary and worn and wanting and whining
How I sought and searched for answers

Then He met me bowed and weather-beaten
He took me out the miry clay
Gave me a song to sing to you
“I once was lost but now I’m found”
And if I’m alive today, it is proof He’s alive and true.

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What God didn’t tell you when you got born again

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That there will be days He seems so far away

That on some days you’ll feel so distant from his grace

That you’ll wet your pillow with tears some nights

That the sun will scorch you in the wilderness some days

That the devil will come after you like a roaring lion

That you’ll have to defeat the giants before you enter the Promise Land.

This would have scared you away from His ultimate purpose for your life.

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But do you know…

That His grace is sufficient and ever present?

That He will never leave you nor forsake you?

That He brings water out of rocks in the wilderness?

That you have authority over that roaring lion?

That, like David you can slay that giant and get the victory?

Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us.

(Romans 8:37)

When God does “dumb” things, Grace is at work

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Say God sends His prophet to marry a whore…why will God ever do such a dumb thing?

God wants to send home a message to His people and that message is that He loves them; that it hurts to love and not be loved in turn. The message of love (grace) is more important than upholding the law.

So God sends His prophet to go get a taste of unrequited love and rejection.

God makes us a message so that we can speak the message with first hand experiential knowledge.

There is something about preaching your message, your own experience.

Prophet Hosea should be stoned for calling himself a prophet of God, yet playing around with a harlot. That is my own judgment on the matter. I’m a human being.

No! He won’t get a death sentence. His is an instruction directly from the throne room and grace from that same throne covers him. There is no telling what could happen to you if you try to get for yourself your own harlot.

We can imitate people’s actions but not the grace of God upon their lives.

  • He slept with a lady, killed her man and married her (David). He is the man after God’s heart.
  • He killed an Egyptian and fled into the desert (Moses). He is the great prophet and leader of Israel.
  • He ruthlessly and heartlessly persecuted and killed Christian (Saul of Tarsus). He is one of the most impactful people in history.

So what is this God up to?

It was never by qualification or self-righteousness. Our own righteousness is but like filthy rags in His eyes (Isaiah 64:6).

Say you do something really dumb, terrible and repugnant. Then you quickly retreat into your bedroom, fall on your knees and start imploring God’s mercy and forgiveness. But all this while you are actually begging Him not to release the thunder bolt and hailstones He’s preparing to rain down on you. You are trembling with fear, shame and guilt and you can’t look God in the face. You cry out in despair “Kill me Lord, I’m not worthy…I’m no good.”

While you are still kneeling there and waiting for the verdict you hear a sound somewhere deep within your spirit “…It is well, it is well with my soul…”

You quickly rebuke yourself for being so “stupid”. How can I be singing such a song when I’m supposed to hang myself for what I just did? You even apologize to God for such a bad conduct. Yet that song won’t go away. You feel like a miserable criminal awaiting a life sentence but your spirit is singing another song.

That is grace. Pure and unadulterated. Will you receive it?

I used to fight that gentle voice with every ounce of energy in me. Imagine I’m reeking of fear and then I hear my spirit singing “fear not…” I’m feeling really guilty and then all I hear is “it is well with my soul…” I’m dead worried about paying the bills, then all I hear is “all things are possible to those who believe”.

Then one day I realized I have been fighting against God’s grace. That “contrary” song welling up from within me is God’s message of grace to me in that situation. I don’t need to feel like that song before I can accept, believe and sing it. I just ignore my emotions and start to sing it out loud.

Grace does not condemn. It encourages us to say “yes” to God’s love.

I came from a background where I had to earn it all through hard work and good works.

Receiving God’s unmerited favor was quite an issue for me. I didn’t understand why God should just give me things, do things for me or pardon my folly without me having to do something to earn it. I always wanted to do something in return. Then one day God got tired of my wrong mindset and came up with a strategy just for me.

He let me mess up so badly and so many times that I thought “woe is me, I’m undone…I’m no good. I’m an embarrassment to you Lord; kill me so that I don’t bring more shame on you…”

I was kneeling there like a condemned criminal waiting for my sentencing. You know what? I instead heard that song “…it is well, it is well with my soul.”

You will ask me, does God condone sin then? No! His grace is bigger than His anger.

God will suspend one of the laws for a season, for a reason and for a person so that a bigger purpose can be achieved. That does not make Him unrighteous. It makes Him sovereign and very merciful.

 

When I waited for condemnation and all I got was love, I began to understand the depth of God’s love and grace for me. I’m a product of grace and I’m sent forth to spread the message of God’s grace.

When I expected rejection and rather got another round of God’s love that is when I began to understand the God I have been “serving” for years. I just realized I never knew Him before.

Since I was the kind of person who always wanted to fix it all on my own, God allowed situations in my life that neither money nor relationships, nor talents nor networking could ever solve. I mean impossible situations. I fought, I networked, and I prayed and fasted…no solution.

Then I learned the song… “I surrender all…”

For how long has God been trying to bring you to the end of yourself so that you can start trusting Him? For how long has He been trying to bring you to an understanding of His grace? How much longer will He stand with outstretched hands while you run about trying to fix it all by your own effort?

I invite you to sing with me…”I surrender all…”

You hate the white flag. You don’t want to see it, let alone use it. But for this situation God is telling you “pull the white flag my child. I can’t come to your rescue until you pull that white flag.”

Don’t try another recipe; ask for God’s own recipe.

 

 

What is your Isaac?

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In my previous posts I have been talking about laying your Isaac on the altar. I have talked about the importance of surrendering it all to God so that God can reveal Himself through you.

But what is your Isaac? That is the question I will attempt in my own humble way to address in this post.

You might just be wondering whether God will ask you to kill your own child. NO! Our God does not require human sacrifice from us like the heathen gods do. He sacrificed His first and begotten son once and for all for us all and that sacrifice is enough.

But now, why does He yet ask for us to sacrifice if Jesus’ sacrifice was just sufficient?

In this post we will see the difference between what Jesus did and what the Father requires us to do today.

We all have different kinds of Isaacs in our lives and my own Isaac might not be the same as yours. An Isaac is that thing, that person, that situation or place that you so much love and cherish and will not want to be separated from. It is that thing you will never willingly give up if you had a choice. It is that thing you think you can’t do without (although God knows you can).

Let me share my experience in this area.

I still see myself weeping profusely and telling God I want to die, I can’t take it anymore; that it’s just too painful for me to bear.

He had asked me to lay Isaac on the altar.

At that moment I thought I could never be happy without that thing He wanted me to lay down on the altar.

At that moment I was convinced in my soul, (not my spirit), that I can never be happy without that relation: yes, it was a relationship.

You know what? He wasn’t some heathen or someone who didn’t know God? That would have been easier to handle. I would have easily understood why God wanted me out of there. NO! he knew God, but he lacked some salient points that were very necessary for the kind of relationship this was supposed to be.

Having been called to be a Christian leader and Minister of the Gospel, God was telling me that I can’t get married to a man who has no respect for what I’m called to do; and who will willingly tolerate behavior which I considered sinful. This may look minute, but when one is called to God’s vine yard, no error is ever too small to spark a wave of unholy scandal.

But because this man was loving, caring, generous and possessed all the qualities I ever asked God for in a life partner, I suddenly became willing to overlook his faults and to forge ahead in a serious relationship. The answer from God was a resounding NO!

How I cried.

My emotions were screaming in a different direction but God loves me too much not to just stand by and see me get into a mess.

So you see? Your Isaac could be just anything. It might even be something God Himself gave to you. (God gave Abraham Isaac). But if that thing becomes a hindrance to His greater purpose in your life, He could ask you to lay it down and let it go.

So what is your own Isaac?

Is it your habits? Your way of dressing, your relationships, the places you love going to or the things you own? Is it a particular hair-do that God doesn’t approve of but you just won’t let go?

It could look insignificant but know that it is not just about staying away from something or somebody. It is more about putting God in the first place and obeying His voice for obedience is better than sacrifice (1 Samuel 15:22).

The Bible says we are Christ’s ambassadors (2 Corinthians 5:20). Therefore anything that will make us not to adequately represent Him must be laid on the altar.

When God puts His finger on a thing in your life, don’t try to justify your choice. Just let go and you will see His glory. He will take you to a new dimension.

Remember, Isaac didn’t die physically on that altar, but the moment Abraham raised that knife to slay the lad, Isaac died in his soul, and that is what God demands from us; that some things die out of our souls so that He can be glorified in our lives.

Lay your Isaac on the altar and leave him there

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We all want God to do great things in our lives. We want Him to use us mightily.

We want to be carriers and transmitters of the presence, power and glory of God.

But there is one great condition that must be fulfilled. We must lay down our all.

We must let Him empty us of all, strip us of us, then He can trust us enough to put AK47s in our hands.

Have you put Isaac on the altar? Have you left him there or you are about to take him back home because you do not trust your God enough to entrust your life into His hands?

Grace: Have you ever experienced it?

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Only those who have received of the grace of God are able to show grace and mercy to others. You can’t give what you don’t have.

If you have never known and experienced God’s grace, you could be unnecessarily hard on others because you do not know just how merciful God is.

When you open your heart to His grace he will pour out so much of it into your heart that when you open your mouth to speak, it is grace that will flow.

Grace is so deep, so unique that we tend to misunderstand it.

Sometimes we fight against grace (God) because we can’t handle the kind of blessing grace has bestowed on us.

Those of us who have always got it by hook, crook and work find it hard to just settle down to the fact that this time we got it all for free, by His grace.

Those of us who have messed up so badly in the past and have paid dearly for it find it hard to understand why God will just forgive us without us paying the price. (Jesus paid that price on the cross).

If you fail to understand grace you could spend your entire life fighting against God’s will for your life.

Knowledge of the grace of God will free you from a lot of headaches and heartaches in this life.

“How hard she tried to earn his love”…continued

The works Peggy did when she was still in her wilderness days were an effort to obtain solutions by her own power. They were not acts of faith based on the acceptance of God’s love. She wanted to help God to help her.
Whenever she failed to get what she wanted, because she thought she had already done all the “work” required to obtain what she wanted, she felt even more rejected and unloved. Then she went ahead to put in more effort to obtain more favor. This was gradually becoming a vicious cycle, and a very bleak one.
For so many years Peggy was in a “palace” but lived the life of a beggar.
When she finally understood who she was and what was hers by right she wanted to go look for the devil and give him a good whipping. How badly she had suffered because of the lies and deceptions of the devil all pointing to the fact that she didn’t deserve any good thing in life.
Before God delivered Peggy from that terrible mindset, she was really a victim when it came to relationships. She gave so much and received so little; in fact she didn’t even know how to receive from others. She thought it was her duty to give but never learned that it was her right to receive. She felt unworthy of good gifts. When you gave her something nice she would wonder why you ever bothered to do so. What had she done to deserve such a gifts? There were surely people out there who deserved it, not her.
Ever wanting to do things that would “make God happy”, she thought buying everything on the Christian market that had a God label on was a fine thing to do.

Peggy could never ask any big thing from God. She thought the good things were for others. She thought her past had already done so much harm to God and she wanted to “spare” God the trouble of having to do so much for her. She had never heard of God’s super-abundant love and mercy. By seeking only those things that were little and easy to get she was in her own way acknowledging that she was not supposed to “trouble” God; the God who had come down to her in her mess.

Little did she know that God felt hurt when she didn’t accept all His gifts to her.

Today she savors every good thing the Lord puts on her table with delight and relish.

How hard she tried to earn his love!

Coming from a background of rejection Peggy knows how far one can go to earn love and acceptance. Growing up and feeling unwanted and unworthy she quickly became the kind of person who will endure all, do all and receive all…if there was even a slight chance of “getting some love and acceptance.”
When she came to know God in a more personal way, she wanted to relate to Him the same way she’s been relating with other humans. She grew up working hard to earn almost everything. So Peggy thought if she worked real hard God will love her more.
The consequence of the low self-image she suffered was that she thought she could gain esteem by working harder than everyone else. This will make her a better person, an accepted person.
She did a lot of things for God, not because she had to but because she thought it will make Him love her more and accept her. She thought by adding her signature to anything that had a Jesus label on it, God would be so happy. So Peggy ended up with accumulated errors and mistakes.
At that time, giving, fasting and other Christian activities were not done as a response to God’s love for her. They were done to earn that love.
She was really too hard on herself; and when God didn’t answer her as she expected Him to do, (as response to her hard work), she felt very dejected and let down.
Then God took her on a journey; a journey to know Him; a journey to receive love and acceptance without “paying” for it somehow.
As if to shock her out of that wrong mind set, God started using her at a time she was still feeling very “unworthy.” In the end, she realized it’s not how much she does, but how much God had done through Christ’s death on the cross.
She was freed from that bondage and she’s been free ever since. Peggy never tries to earn anything from God any longer. She now knows all things are hers because Christ paid the price for that.
Peggy is now living the Christian life as God wants her to live.

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