Do you feel comfortable asking for help? Do you with ease receive and appreciate help from others?
Let’s share our experiences in this area.
If your answer to the above questions is no, then read on as we examine some of the reasons why people feel uncomfortable with this.
- You’ve always done it your way. You don’t want another person’s way out.
- You’re used to doing it alone. You prefer the solo route.
- You once asked for it and were rejected; you’re scared of rejection.
- You’re too proud to admit you need help.
- You think asking for help is a sign of weakness and insufficiency.
- You have a false sense of responsibility; you don’t want to inconvenience anyone.
- You don’t want to have to pay for it one day; you don’t like helping others yourself.
- You just don’t know how to ask for help. You walk down to the fellow and then you walk pass them tongue-tight.
- You don’t know how to receive and appreciate help; you’re afraid to mess up.
Whatever your own reason may be it is important to get to the root of it and get over it.
It feels very miserable to be in need of something someone wants to offer, yet be held back from asking for any reason whatsoever.
The world is full of people who want to help you. Do not shut them out of your life. Give them the opportunity to experience the joy of giving.
What will you do if you found out that the person who helped you get a break in life has become jealous and bitter because of your success? Such people can lead you to a sense of guilt and a false sense of responsibility. They give the impression that everything you own is somehow theirs because “they helped you get it.” Every time you spend a dollar on yourself, you feel guilty as if you were spending their money.
You feel obliged to take care of their every whim and to be always at their beck and call. They really make life miserable for you.
Don’t get me wrong, we are supposed to show gratitude and love to those who have been so good to us in the past.God demands it and it is good moral behavior. But if all my life I have to deal with someone who is breathing down the back of my neck and telling me how to spend every dime I earn, it becomes a problem.
Nobody can take credit for what you have become in life. You are where you are today because God blessed you and crowned their own effort in your life with success. There is joy in the fact that you invested in someone and they succeeded. We do not need to wish we were in their shoes or be bitter because they have become what we did not imagine.
If you are currently wilting under such a situation, be courageous enough to tell the person in question the truth. They should allow you to show gratitude to them without putting pressure on you. They should not think they have to push you around just because they gave you some money “ten years ago.” Refuse to live under servitude because you once had a benefactor, ” God is the ultimate benefactor.” God Himself has never subjected anyone to slavery just because His Son died on the cross for them.
Feel free to say no and don’t live the rest of your life miserably, afraid to enjoy yourself because you once accepted help from somebody. Do not carry along a false sense of responsibility towards people who have become lazy because they know they can manipulate you to get what they want. Be free in Jesus name.