HEALING BROKEN HEARTS AND WOUNDED SOULS

Posts tagged ‘Joy’

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Moving on…not easy but very necessary

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The Anatomy of self-doubt

Do you find it hard to trust yourself? Are you scared of taking decisions because you’re afraid to make mistakes and bear the consequences?

Self-doubt is a thief who will steal your joy, your sense of self-worth and self-confidence; it will keep you in a stupor too fearful to try things out and discover their outcome.

Self–doubt immobilizes you with fear. You dread taking risks because you do not want to fail.

But the truth is, in life we can’t achieve much without stepping out to try things out and then see what we get at the end of the road. We only have to trust God at such moments to lead and guide us in the right direction, and to bring us back on track when we go astray.

What are some of the things that provoke self-doubt?

  • You’ve messed up too many times in life and you’re afraid to mess up another time. You prefer to play it safe this time.
  • You’ve been disappointed so often; you’d rather be careful.
  • You’ve been hurt too much; you won’t let it happen to you again; your guards are always up.
  • You’ve often been told you’re no good; you now belief it’s true. You don’t want to confirm that ugly report.
  • The devil is plaguing you with the spirit of fear and dread. You are under captivity and you need deliverance.
  • You just hate trying out new things; you’re the comfort zone kind of person.

Self-doubt in itself is not bad, especially the kind that pushes you to ask questions, try out new recipes and do research to find answers. This can actually lead to self-improvement which we all need.

What I’m talking about here is the kind of negative, tormenting self-doubt that makes you to devalue yourself and to doubt your own capability at achieving anything great.

When we understand that God has promised never to leave us or abandon us, that He will not be very angry with us for messing us, that He will readily take us back and continue to love us even when we’ve made mistakes, we will be more willing to take bold steps and to leap forward, counting on Him to see us through.

So what is the cure for self-doubt?

Trust that God knows your doubt and that He’s ready to give you answers when you ask him questions. Trust that He will faithfully guide and lead you along the way. Trust that Christ in you is wisdom, power and a sound mind.

Good luck to you all as you take bold steps and great leaps forward achieve great things in this year 2016.

For Christ’s sake only (2 Corinthians 12:10).

After talking about the weakness he’s made to endure, after showing how he takes pleasure in weaknesses, reproaches, persecutions and distresses, Apostle Paul says something that really becomes an eye opener for me.

“For Christ’s sake.”

The only reason he will take the shame, the pain and the rain is for Christ’s sake. If it is not for Christ’s sake he won’t take it.

If we Christian people aren’t careful we could accept anything, anyhow, anywhere and from anybody with “joy and gladness” thinking we are being very spiritual.

The only reason that authorizes you to endure suffering is for Christ’s sake. If it’s not for that reason, get out of there.

If it’s not for the name of God to be glorified, if it’s not for the gospel to reach the uttermost parts, if it’s not to help a brother/sister in distress, get out of there.

 

Beyond the Surface

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It’s not just about having followers

It’s more about having followers who really do follow

It’s not just about having likes

It’s more about having likes that come from the heart

It’s not just about having a church

It’s more about having a church that transforms the church-goer

It’s not just about having a job

It’s more about giving our best at that job

It’s not just about having kids

It’s more about experiencing the joy of parenthood

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It’s not just about having a spouse

It’s more about finding the bone of my bone

It’s not just about being educated

It’s more about being transformed by our education

It’s not just about having a leadership position

It’s more about leading people in the right direction

It’s not just about giving

It’s more about becoming a gift to my generation

It’s not just about saying something

It’s more about meaning what we say.

We all are tired of the superficial;

Let’s peel the layers and get deeper;

I love it real and authentic…and you?

You are not single

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You are not single.

You are married to Jesus

One day He will lend you out for a season

To the man who dares present such a request

A faithful steward who will keep you in good shape

And present you to your husband when He comes to take you home

And if your Husband chooses to keep you jealously to Himself

Shout for joy for you are even dearer to His heart, most precious in His sight

And He knows you’ll never find a better husband than the one He is to you.

HARD TO PLEASE? DEAL WITH IT NOW.

When I look back on my life I discover that the time I was the hardest to please coincides with the time I hated myself the most. What is the relationship between these two realities?

If you do not like yourself, nobody else will be able to make you do it and you will be rather hard to please. Why do people hate themselves so?

  1. Long exposure to negative feedback. When people keep hitting it home that you are no good, you could end up accepting it and that will define the way you see yourself.
  2. Lack of positive feedback and appreciation for efforts you invest. When no one ever tells you it was well done you could start thinking you never do anything worth encouraging.
  3. Your best efforts always seem to produce the most mediocre results. You must find out what you are good at and excel therein. You can’t get your best grades in an area you are not gifted in.
  4. The kind of things that happened to you in the past. You might have messed up much too often. But remember, we all do mess up sometimes.
  5. Disabilities that make you look and feel different. This could be very tough, but not impossible to overcome. You need God’s grace for this one. God can enable you to love yourself in spite of any disability you carry.

                                                                                                                                                          

When faced with self-hatred, we must not blame anyone for our condition. This will only lead to bitterness and that is not good either, for our emotional stability.

It will be an error to try to use our relationships as a means of finding happiness. Strive to get happy as an individual. If you want to get it out of others you might become too demanding and more difficult to please.

Don’t use other people’s successes and achievements as a means to your own happiness. They might no longer be there tomorrow and you will find yourself sinking even lower.

From my own experience I can tell you that getting a lot of stuff around you doesn’t help. A new house, a new car etc. will help you but only for a season.

Ask yourself if you can really be happy if all the stuff were taken away from you. If the answer is yes, then you are happy indeed, or let me say you are experiencing joy.

What do I do then?

  • Ask God to show you your intrinsic value. There is something about you that when you discover you will begin to sing, and then you will never stop singing ever.
  • Develop your potentials and become a blessing to others. There is great joy in giving. When you live your life helping others you will hardly get depressed.
  • Find out your weaknesses and accept them. Stop trying to wipe away your weaknesses by your efforts. If you fail you could become more depressed. Acknowledge them, bring them to God and leave them there.
  • Read the kind of books that will build up your self-image. Avoid going to places and being with people that speak negativity, that always try to bring you down.

Be happy apart from them, then you will be happy with them.

When you get into a relationship it should be to share what you have, not to get what you want.

Quotes

The joy is on the other side of hard work.

John Piper in Think

YOU ARE NOT ALONE

I see you in that dark little room
All alone and lonesome in your thoughts
Wondering what is driving everyone around
To that frenzy of excitement and craze.

I see you wiping a tear from your cheek
Asking yourself why you have to go on
When there is just so little to live for.

I see you, angry and bitter and broke
Because you can’t join in the celebration
Not because you don’t want to
But because you don’t fit in.

I see you draw the blinds in frustration
“Who cares if I don’t go out?
No one’s gonna miss me anyway.
They’re all having fun out there.”

I want to tell you dear friend
That someone misses you so bad
Though they may not have the courage to say so
They miss that smile though so rare.

Jesus came for you too my friend
Any little act of love, joy and peace
You pose this season
Honors and welcomes your Friend to the earth.

So go out there and join the celebration
Not because you feel like it
But because He feels for you, just you
And wants to hold you in His arms.

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU. JESUS CARES, YES INDEED HE DOES. HE SEES YOUR PAIN, SHAME AND LONELINESS. HE COMMUNICATED IT TO MY HEART AND GAVE ME THESE WORDS JUST FOR YOU. I CAN FEEL YOUR YEARNINGS AND DESIRES. NOT BECAUSE I’M SUPER HUMAN, BUT BECAUSE I’VE BEEN THERE TOO. HE WIPED AWAY MY TEARS; HE WILL DO SAME FOR YOU.
AMEN.

STAY CONNECTED

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We are designed to be worshipers.

If we fail to worship God we will end up worshiping a god.

Only in Him can we find true joy and fulfillment.

An Independent Republic of Humanity will never work.

He is the vine and we are only the branches. John 15:4-5.

WHAT KIND OF LEADER ARE YOU?

 

No matter what we are called to do in life, no matter where we fine ourselves, we will have to submit to some kind of leadership or the other. Chances are that we might be the one in leadership position. A leader is the Captain of the ship. He is the visionary in the house and can like God, see the end from the beginning. He gives direction because he knows the destination.

 

       A leader who feels threatened by the gifts and potentials of his follower cannot effectively handle his duties. When the relationship with a leader reaches a level where he really feels threatened and insecure with the mentee, disciple or follower, the best solution is for them to part because there is bound to be conflict, suspicion and little or no collaboration.

       This should not be so. A leader should know his capacity and potential and equally understand that there comes a time when the mentor has completely duplicated himself in his disciple. This means that the latter can do almost all that his master does, but for the many years of wisdom-inspiring experience which the master has acquired and which his disciple is still aspiring to.

       In Genesis chapter 31, Jacob had to quit Laban because the latter was becoming intimidated by Jacob’s speed and progress. The house became too little to contain the two and it was difficult to know who was master and who was servant. Laban became really uncomfortable with his nephew’s progress. If you spend your entire life with such people, you will hardly fulfill your destiny. They are too bitter about their own slow progress to help you advance; they are too jealous to recommend you to your Boaz (Ruth 3:1-4) and they will intentionally withhold information that could help launch you into your destiny. This should not be so because a child, no matter how smart, will never be greater than his father and the joy of a father should be to see his children achieve what he has dreamed up.

Let us consider the story of King Saul and young David. When God anointed David King in the place of Saul, it was time for the latter to retire from active service and let his “son” David take up the relay baton. This was the time for Saul to humble himself and take on the role of a mentor to this young king since he knew the terrain already. He had been there already, made some mistakes; now he could have said, “son, I made some mistakes I’m not proud of and I will not like you to do same. We have the same mission, to lead God’s people so I will help you as best as I can to fulfil your divine assignment.” No. Saul saw David as a rival. He was not comfortable with his progress. This pushed him to extreme bitterness and wickedness.

However, David being a more mature leader even at his young age remained humble and wise under the terrible rule of Saul and refused to harm him even when it was in his power to do it. David fulfilled his assignment in spite of it all.

No matter how uncomfortable you might feel about someone’s progress, you cannot stop what God wants to do in their life. No matter how hard you try to destroy them, God’s sovereignty will finally prevail. So why not rather team up with them so that you can benefit from the fall outs?

Since submission to leadership is inevitable in life, we must pray for God to place us under good leadership and once we find ourselves in such positions, we should continue to pray for our leaders so that we may lead a quiet and  peaceable life (1 Timothy 2 1-2).

 

 

I FEEL EMPTY AFTER IT ALL

Life can feel very empty at times and people are constantly looking for ways to fill the emptiness in their lives. In spite of all their efforts to live fulfilled lives, they keep coming up against that concrete wall of frustration.

Have you been thinking been asking yourself what is the essence of life? Perhaps life makes no sense to you. You are seeking for the happiness you see in others and you desperately want some joy. Your hopes have suddenly vanished in a car accident, a fire incidence or a job loss. Are you mourning the death of a dear one? Are you tired of congratulating others and never being congratulated in return? Perhaps you have all the things that you think can make you happy, yet that nagging feeling of emptiness remains.

You have tried drugs and alcohol as a means of drowning your hopelessness; you have on porn and indiscriminate sexual relationships but no cure. Maybe you tried sports and clubs, shopping sprees and lavish spending to get fame and a name. You even tried religion too. You have been to church, to the mosque and you are meditated with Buddhists in monasteries on hill tops.

I have good news for you. Stop trying to fix it all alone. You do not have to carry that burden alone. Jesus says in Matthew 11:28 to bring all your cares, worries, frustrations and fears to Him. Such a load is too heavy for you; He has a lighter load and an easier burden for you. Hand it over to Him and watch Him replace it with peace, joy and a new desire to reach for the moon. Give your broken pieces to the potter and He will know what quality of vessel to bring out of it.

Make up your mind to go beyond religion. Go for relationship. You cannot get peace and joy from the respect of man-made laws and rituals. A once-in-a-while stop over in church will not help you. Go deeper with God and know His will for your life. Read His Word (the Bible) and know what He has in store for you. Then hold onto it, believe it and confess it and you will see it come to pass in your life.

WHEN I LOOK BACK

What do you see when you look back on your life and the years you have spent on earth? Wasted years, ignorance and its consequences? No matter what your life is or has been, thank God you are still alive, thus there is a possibility to make amends. God’s grace surely covers up our times of ignorance, but requires that we repent and be transformed (Romans 12:2) Now that you have come to the knowledge of the truth, there is no need crying over things you can never change, “oh if only I knew, if someone had told me…” The truth is, you cannot turn back the hands of time and you cannot even wipe off the chapters of your past.

One day I told myself, if only I could be conceived anew, I will give my life to Christ right from my mother’s womb, so that by the time I step into this world, I will be a Holy Ghost-filled, tongue–talking born again child of God. But that is never going to happen so I have learned to live as best as I can , forgetting those things that are behind and reaching for the best which is yet to come. No matter how good or bad your past has been, it cannot be compared to the things God has in store for you. You are still alive, you still have it all.


On treasure Island

Serving God is like finding a treasure. You go through thick and thin, over mountains and down valleys. People doubt, people misunderstand, some laugh and still others mock. They can’t see what keeps you in such passion. What keeps you going is the hope and assurance that someday, some how, somewhere, you will find the treasure and you will then live happily ever after.  In the end, like Apostle Paul, you will say “I have fought a good fight, I have finished the course, I have kept the faith: Henceforth there is laid up for me a crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, shall give me at that day; and not to me only, but unto all them also that love his appearing (2Timothy 4:7-8).”

There is peace, joy and a sense of fulfilment to be enjoyed when our lives please God, and then we await His return with no fear or apprehension because we already know our final destination; in the arms of our Lord Jesus.

     A TIME OUT WITH GOD

 

What kind of prayer are you used to? When you think of prayer what comes to your mind? Is it worship, warfare or weeping? The kind of prayer you are versed with is a reflection of the kind of relationship you have with God and your level of maturity. It reflects your intimacy with Him. The Bible says that God inhabits the praises of His people. When you are in the business of binding, casting, and breaking, the best God can do for you is to send you assistance to help you out. He then turns His attention to those who in their deep desire for intimacy with their Daddy have taken a time out with Him to express their love in acts of worship.

“Lord, show me your glory, I want to see you face, I am hungry for you, I need to feel your arms around me, and I am dying for a touch of love…”

No lover will remain indifferent to such a deep expression of love. Asking things from God and binding devils does not draw God any closer to you. It draws His power, not His presence.

The next time you are feeling lonely, the next time you feel God is very far from you, you now know what to do. Invite you loving Daddy out for a walk.

 

When we first met

 

It was a dark day from the start

I walked down the winding street

Little knew I where I was headed

All I know, I needed a change.

It was a long and painful journey

Weary and worn and weak I was

Thirsting and hungering from my long long search

For peace and joy and who knows what.

It was a great encounter

A man I once heard could help my lot

Though I thought him cruel and crooked

Like many a man I’ve met in my life.

                                       They say He is a lowly Carpenter

But I find Him too gentle of touch to be

They say He came from little Nazareth

But I think Him too great there to belong

For all I know, He wiped my tears away

And washed me clean of all my slime

He made me think I ought to live

To make His mercies known to all

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