A season for emotional healing

 

 

Yes, that is what Christmas means to me this year; a season for emotional healing.

This because this year, this particular Christmas season, God has led me to help so many people who are in bondage because of past hurts and wounds incurred in the past.

I have had to help people get up from the fall of financial bankruptcy, disappointments in relationships, broken homes, family strife, divorce and the trauma caused by shameful experiences of the past.

What is your own story? Have you been abused, ostracized, rejected, hated, ridiculed and insulted?

Do not give up on life, there are still good people out there. Do not give up on yourself, you still have much to give out to the world. Do not give up on God, because He will never give up on you.

Yes, someone hurt you in the past. But they do not deserve that you continue suffering for their sake. Face that pain squarely and tell it ” I’m not letting you kill me…I’m bigger than this…I’m not done with life yet…”

Do not take that hurt into the new year. I challenge you to lay it down at the feet of your Savior, Jesus. Dare to speak out…share it with someone who cares. It will lift off some of the pain. Face that person and tell them what they did wasn’t right. If they acknowledge it, good, if not, you would have taken a load off your chest.

Just do something about it.

Shalom, Gretiana

 

 

“Lord, are you ashamed of me now?”

December 13^th; a long awaited day; an anticipated day. How I longed to join the list of my predecessors who had sat on tables and signed out book; their books, their own creation, a piece of themselves given out to the readership.

The day came and went, but alas! New reality was about to hit me in the face.

I love meeting with God outdoors. The trees, the flowers, the butterflies, the green grass, the fresh breeze…there’s something about these that just draw me so close to my Maker, my Creator.

But on this fateful day I wasn’t basking in His love as usual. I wasn’t sitting there, awe-stricken by the beauty of His creation. I was looking for something to hold onto. I was worried. I needed validation from the one in whose name I’d done what I did.

“Lord, are you also ashamed of me?”

“Why are they looking at me like that? Why are my friends avoiding me? Why the weird look on their faces? Why are they “unfriending” me on Face book? Why do my own family relations desire to ask me questions after reading those books, Lord?

Did I say things that hurt them? Did I give away too much of myself? Was I too transparent? Lord, why are they ashamed to identify with me now?

Lord, are you also ashamed of me? Are you ashamed of me because I said too much about the messes, failures, frailties and struggles of my past?

I wish I hadn’t added that little detail. I wish I’d kept this one secret. How I hate myself for having talked about that thing I did. I shouldn’t have exposed what they did to me”

Genuinely speaking, I was full of regret about lots of things I’d said in those books.

The great testimonies I got from some of my readers couldn’t compensate for the strange reactions I was receiving from close friends and relations. I was beaten down by shame and regret. I’d given away too much and it was too late to take it back.

At least that’s how I felt that day.

I really thought God must be very ashamed of me for exposing my past messiness and bringing dishonor to His HOLY NAME.

Then, came the lever out of hell. These are the words I wrote in my journal that day:

“What matters to me is not the size of my bank account, how beautiful and admired I am, how accepted I am. What matters to me is making a difference in people’s lives.

What is the use of having a bank account that’s full to the brim or a spotless name when you can’t give hope to desperate people around you? I won’t hold back or run now? I won’t fear to speak out. I can’t disown my past.

My past is my ministry and my ministry is my past. To disown my past is to disown my ministry and I can’t do that. I’ll rather be rejected and ostracized than shut up and watch people perish.

God has called me to use my past as a message to pull people out of their mess. I’m proud to be a world-changer, a person whose contribution is making the world a better place for us all”.

The Lord spoke to me. He held me in His arms and told me He was proud of me because I’d accepted to lay down my pride, dignity and name for the lost. It’s a sacrifice, a bitter and embarrassing sacrifice. It’s not easy but it’s worth it.

Jesus showed us the example by accepting the shame of the CROSS. Will you lay down your name, fame, gain, pride and dignity in order to put a smile on that tear-stained face?

God is asking you today.

 

 

Two broken hearts

They love each other

But they are too afraid

To let give in to each other

To express that feeling that’s burning inside.

They’ve loved before

And got hurt in the process

They are afraid to get hurt again

So they’ve become too careful

Too careful to give it away.

And they end up hurting each other,

Because they don’t want to be hurt again.

In need of emotional healing? What are some of the signs?

When you think of the past you are full of shame, regret, anger and bitterness. You try not to think about it.

• You confess you have forgiven them but you just can’t get the scenes out of you mind. You keep having painful flashbacks.

• You hurt other people consciously or unconsciously and then you cry later on, or simply regret why you did it in the first place.

• It is unbearable for you to stand the sight of those who are going through what you have been through. They are a mirror where you see your own pain.

• You find it difficult to be compassionate to those going through the same pain you have been through. You cannot give to others what you do not have.

• No matter how much love and care you receive from others you complain and accuse others for not caring or for wanting to hurt you. You feel insecure and you dread being hurt again.

• You always try to attract attention to yourself and your needs and do not care about how others might feel. You are the centre of your own world.

• You always suspect people are out to harm you, you hardly give people the benefit of the doubt and you are always trying to defend yourself even when no one really wants to hurt you.

• You hate making mistakes and when they do happen you do all in your power to cover them up. You are afraid to lose some more self-esteem.
• You can go extra lengths just to gain approval and appreciation even if you have to pay a very high cost for it.
• You find it difficult to celebrate with achievers. You’d rather mourn with losers than celebrate with winners.

If you currently find yourself in this condition, you are in need of emotional healing. You can’t go on like that. That is not how life was meant to be for you.